fullmoonfever:

yesterday while watching a top chef marathon, i got really frustrated and angsty. one of the master chefs was talking about her illustrious career and how she always knew she wanted to be a chef, since the age of 12.

when i was 12, i had to write a research paper on some sort of career. i suppose it was to be on the career i wished to pursue. have i written about this before? i can’t remember. i had 6 gluten free beers last night and i can’t remember. i chose to research the career of a dolphin trainer, and my topic was turned down by my teacher. what the fuck is that about. so i wrote, instead, about the career of a disc jockey. i have always been going places.

there were two things i was good at when i was 12. swimming and cello playing. neither could be considered for “careers” later in life, but middle class kids got to do things for fun after school, and then those fun things eventually turned into enormous pains in the ass and you quit forever. if i did not turn into a really good swimmer, i wouldn’t have had to do it 6 days a week and i might still be playing the cello today.

there is no point or conclusion here, i am just angry at america for encouraging competition instead of art and nature. or maybe the point is that i am a big fat fucking hippie and i wish i was still good at the cello, good enough to go on tour with some band for the next 6 months.